Me

Carissa
20

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Sunday, April 8, 2012

I tried..

I know I was wrong in the past but you can't deny you didn't commit any mistakes.
Like you always sid we are learning.. I learnt the hard way so did you..
I regretted. I remorsed.
I need a chance, a last and once more..

Every words from you is as sharp as a stab, pierced through my everysingle tissues and veins.
You lost your interest in talking to me. Everyday I waited just for your replies..
Replies that are cold and hurting.
I leave it aside. I told myself no matter how hurt my heart would get I must hang on.
It's just a chance from you..

Everytime, you never wanted to hold on. You know I always say words that are out of rage.
You know I couldn't control. You know I'm born like this.
But why can't you just close an eyes on whenever I said something wrong.
I didn't mean it..
I was wrong..

I promise to chance for the better. I won't interfere your life. Even if you would forget I'm your gf, I'm okay. Just leave a space for me in your heart, even at the least important.
I won't say anything or scold you at all.. I will be on my own.
Just don't leave me. I will heal my aches by myself just to make you happy.
I want you to be happy I will make sure you can be happy when you are with me.
I promise I will be good, I will..
You can scold me all you want, do whatever you like but dont throw me aside.

I know I don't have a space in your heart anymore. But please, just spare me one.
I don't need my pride.. You dont't have to accompany or meet me if you don't wish.
I can make the effort to go find you and see you for awhile.
Or even if you don't wish to see me at all, I can stand aside and look at you from far.
Just to take a look at you.

My heart has broken into millions of pieces, the excruciating pain is killin' me.
I can hardly feel my breathe. I don't seems to get control of my tears.
I got no motivations for anything.. My mind is filled with you just you.

Can you understand what i mean? Why don't you feel as sad as I'm?
Why can't you let the unhappiness go?
Why can't your love for me resolved everything?
Do you even love me as much? I always asked myself.
I loved you with my whole heart.. I take all the blames.. I just hope you understand.

I need you badly now.

Penning down; 8:57 PM